in-authenticity kills creativity. period.
I learnt this the hard way.
Of course I knew in-authenticity kills creativity. Everyone knows that.
But to experience it brings about a whole new level of meaning.
So what happened you ask? Well. Put simply. I was saying yes when I should of been saying no.
To not one but two projects. Yes I was silly enough to make the same mistake twice at the exact same time. Talk about the universe wanting to teach me a lesson! But big lessons are quickly learnt so there is definitely a plus side to all this!
So what really happened? … I was asked to work on two shoots. Two shoots that could have been amazing (for the right person). And I really wasn’t the right person. One of them I felt like it was a shoot I “should do” … and the other was one I thought “I’d be silly to say no”. However what was common with both was – neither inspired me.
For whatever reason, I couldn’t creatively connect with the people/ subjects/ concepts. I knew that from the beginning (intuition said so). Needless to say both fell through and secretly (and not so secretly) … I’m glad they did.
In-authenticity not only kills creativity but it also kills ones reputation. When you commit to something you are only half inspired by it shows in your work and your communication (it certainly did in mine). What’s worse is in-authenticity kills creativity in all other areas. I noticed the moment I said yes to both projects … and as the projects drew nearer … I couldn’t write. I couldn’t blog. I couldn’t come up with creative ideas for other shoots. Every time I sat down to do something thaoski related – everything shut down.
It was only when both projects fell through and I had to get real with myself (thanks to a little birdie who reminded me I had to tell the truth) … that a) things started to come together again b) a weight was lifted off my shoulders and c) I thought … shit I should have just been honest from the beginning.
I often hear photographers talk about when they first start out they say yes to everything … and then there comes a point in time when you chose only to work with people you connect with and are inspired by. It’s tempting to want to say yes to everything. To not let an opportunity go. But a good friend and photographer once told me … “you are only as good as your last photo shoot”. And with that in mind, why would you ever say yes to something that only half inspired you?
So I’m sharing this very honest learning to remind anyone who comes across blog … say yes to what you love and you’ll end up loving what you do,.
And I’ve now committed to only saying yes to projects I’m truly, deeply and magically inspired by.
Onwards and upwards from here. XXXX
ps. Since letting go of those two projects, two new ones that I’m totally inspired by have entered my world. And I’m all inspired again!
pps. Image above from FFFFOUND.COM